They Really Said It
By Joe Wilcox, Tasfaa Times Editor

By popular demand, this column is being continued, for the sheer joy and stress relief that it brings to us. Enjoy.

• A borrower called into LGO at TG and was fairly positive that they had borrowed a Dolly Madison Loan (it was actually Sallie Mae). Maybe they were confused due to the massive amount of cupcakes they had eaten for breakfast?
  
  
• A loan representative was recently asked about a loan this caller had heard about. The caller wanted information on the loan where the "interest was written off after three years along with interest forgiven for the remaining life of the loan". After a couple of seconds of extensive research, I informed him that someone mislead him. It's a new twist on getting one of those "free" loans. At least in this case he knew principal would have to be repaid. Program where interest is forgiven for the life of the loan? Oh yes, that would be Death!
  
  
• A student called into the school financial aid office and asked, “Can you tell me where I can park my RV?” How about next to the Rolls Royce and Lamborghini out front.
  
  
• The campus telephone operator called the financial aid office and asked, “Do you have another number for the billing office? Their number is always busy.” Sure, dial 0 and ask the campus telephone operator.
  
  
• Student comes to the general information counter of the financial aid office and asks, "Do I have to be enrolled to get a student loan? I will be enrolled next semester, but I’m not enrolled now and really need the funds now." Sure we can give you a loan, but there is a 180 day hold on the first disbursement.
  
  
• "I’ve been offered all of these student loans and I’d like to have them switched out with grants because I don’t want to take on any debt right now." No problem, just complete this 50,000 page astrophysics survey in Swahili and we’ll be right with you.